A Good Old-Fashioned Lenten Fast

I read something today that I’ve honestly never thought about before.  An article by Fr. Daniel Merz at USCCB.org points out that Adam and Eve were asked to fast.  To fast is to limit oneself in some way, to do without.  God asked Adam and Eve to “do without” that one tree.  As we know, they chose to break that fast.

That tree, and the breaking of that fast, symbolize the choices we have in life, the free will which is the greatest of human gifts.  Without free will, there are no relationships because there is no love.  Without free will, we aren’t human.

Adam and Eve lived in a paradise of sorts.  And yet even in this paradise, they were asked to fast.  This simple idea helps us understand fasting – its purpose, its goodness, and why it should still be part of our lives.  Most of us modern Americans live in a kind of paradise in the sense that we have every single thing we need or want practically within arms’ reach.  Want entertainment?  Get it.  Want news?  Got it.  Want food?  Open the fridge. 

Fasting is a deliberate attempt on our part to put the brakes on “having it all.”  It seems that even God, who wanted the very best for Adam and Eve, thought it wise to give them limits.  Of course this wasn’t to cause suffering or to impose his “rules” on them.  Perhaps the fast simply allows the opportunity to live more deliberately, to make choices.  There’s a link between fasting and freedom.    

I like a good old-fashioned Lenten fast.  I like the idea of giving something up.  It’s so simple.  It’s so obvious.  It’s so good.  I know there’s a lot of buzz out there about not giving up sweets or alcohol or any of those very old-school things.  I disagree.  Put the brakes on.  Exercise your free will.  Feel the freedom of saying “no.”  Because that link between fasting and freedom is really a link between fasting and love.  Our Lenten fast is a deliberate offering of our freedom for the sake of the other.  Perhaps it is a simple offering of love between you and Jesus.  Or perhaps when you fast, you turn that sacrifice into a material gift for someone in real need, someone who doesn’t have a “material paradise” at their fingertips.

Another way fasting helps us love is simply by training us to “put the brakes on” in other areas of our lives.  The discipline we gain from giving up concrete things like food, drink, and entertainment, can help us learn to give up those more abstract things like gossip, grudges and impatience.  If we have the strength to say no to an afternoon snack, maybe we will have the strength to walk away from that hurtful conversation at work. 

The goal of Lent is no different than the goal of life:  to love God and love our neighbor.  I know I can do that better when I have self-control and when I live deliberately, when my life is not about easy living but about slowly turning myself outward, toward the other – God and my neighbor.  There’s a link between fasting and love.  Lent is the right time to discover it.

John Kohan, Mixed Media Collage, Courtesy John Kohan, sacredartpilgrim.com.

That Mighty Heart on Amazon!

Just a note to let you know that my 2014 book, That Mighty Heart, is now available on Amazon as a paperback or eBook! 

I would love it if any of you who have read the book could take a few minutes to leave a review on Amazon.  Here’s the link:  That Mighty Heart on amazon.com.

I’m working on my next blog collection entitled In Every Life, as well as a new title in the Little Rock Scripture Study Series Alive in the Word that will be available in the fall (Lent: Season of Transformation).  I’ll keep you posted! Thank you for reading!

Sunday's Gospel: Self-Preservation vs. Love

The following is republished with permission from my column in Catechist Magazine.  For subscription information, visit Catechist.com.

FEBRUARY 19, Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time, Gospel Reading: Matthew 5:38-48

In this Sunday’s Gospel reading, Jesus continues to examine laws and take us to a deeper, more demanding understanding of them. He continues to follow the “antithesis” formula: “You have heard that it was said ... But I say to you ... ”

This excerpt from the Sermon on the Mount provides us with some of Jesus’ most revolutionary and challenging teachings. First Jesus acknowledges a long-standing law of retribution: “You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth'” (verse 38). This ancient way of living in community, though it may sound harsh to our modern ears, was indisputably logical and certainly effective in preventing some crimes. If you knew that if you gouged someone’s eye out, they could lawfully gouge your eye out, you might think twice about doing the gouging in the first place!

And yet, as we might expect, this ancient law was far from Jesus’ ideal. He proceeded to teach something far less logical, something that goes against the grain of just about every human instinct we have: “But I say to you, offer no resistance to one who is evil. When someone strikes you on your right cheek, turn the other one as well” (verse 39). Jesus goes on to offer similar difficult teachings about giving to anyone who asks, and serving anyone who makes a request of you. All of this is to be done without expecting anything in return.

The next antithesis is even more difficult: “You have heard that it was said, You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (verses 43-44). This may be the most-ignored teaching of Jesus in the history of Christianity. How often do we excuse ourselves from it because it seems so extreme? How often do we tell ourselves that Jesus did not mean it for our particular situation? How often do we secretly deem it impossible? Indeed, as Jesus continues to preach, we discover that he wants us to live like God himself: “For he makes his sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and unjust” (verse 45). Being like God is a tall order, but Jesus does not say “try” or “sometimes.” He simply says to do it.

Our most basic human instinct is self-preservation. Jesus is challenging this instinct. He wants us to receive his teaching with the total dedication of a true disciple. If we do, our instincts can gradually be reshaped. Self-preservation falls by the wayside as we begin to instinctively act out of love for others. This teaching is as revolutionary now as it was then. To intentionally make sacrifices for the sake of others is the way of Jesus himself, the way of the Cross, the way of true discipleship.

ASK YOURSELF: In what area of my life can I live these difficult teachings? How can I avoid retaliating, even in small ways? How can I show love for someone who is opposed to me in some way?

ASK YOUR STUDENTS: Do you think it is impossible to love someone who is your enemy? How might you learn to do this? When Jesus says we should allow someone to strike us, do you think he means we should allow others to physically hurt us or verbally abuse us? Help your students distinguish between abuse (which should never be tolerated) and situations where they can safely choose not to retaliate (discuss some examples).

PRAY: Lord Jesus, you must think very highly of me to have such wonderful expectations of me! Help me to live up to your expectations. I can only follow your teachings if you help me.

LIVE THE GOSPEL: This week identify someone in your life who may not be an “enemy” but who is difficult to live with, work with, or be around. Ask God daily for the grace to love this person. Pray for this person. Find small, concrete ways to extend kindness to them.

Grisaille (underpainting) of Jesus and Thomas by Jack Baumgartner.  The stance of Jesus in this scene demonstrates the absolute receptiveness of Jesus to the other.  It might be trite to say a picture speaks a thousand words, but this one actually does.  Published with permission.  More of Jack's incredible work can be found here. 

Family Ain't Easy

The gritty but beautiful words from Pope Francis below remind me of something Mother Teresa used to say – that it’s easier to feed a hungry stranger than to love the hurting person inside your own home.  How we take each other for granted in the family!  How we don’t take the time.  How we mess up.  But how we keep trying!

When I read these words I feel the way I imagine I might have felt if Jesus was preaching to me – upbraided but inspired – put in my place but not ashamed – aware of my shortcomings but excited about changing. 

May God grant us “tired faces from generous giving” in our families!

“It is true that living in a family is not always easy, and can often be painful and stressful but, as I have often said referring to the Church, I prefer a wounded family that makes daily efforts to put love into play, to a society that is sick from isolationism and habitually afraid of love. I prefer a family that makes repeated efforts to begin again, to a society that is narcissistic and obsessed with luxury and comfort. I prefer a family with tired faces from generous giving, to faces with makeup that know nothing of tenderness and compassion.”

— Pope Francis, Address to Families in Tuxtla Gutierrez, Mexico, Feb. 2016

Magnificat Reflection on Parenting: "Christ's Own Forever"

My thanks to Magnificat for allowing me to republish the following reflection, which I originally wrote for their column “She Pondered These Things in Her Heart” (January 2017).  

"Christ's Own Forever"

A beautiful thing about ritual is that the words of our rites often echo in our minds when we need them most.  Raising four children in a world of conflicting voices can be a daunting task.  When my husband and I worry about the choices our children could make and the harm that might come to them, the words that reverberate in my mind and heart come from an old baptismal rite, one I heard many times in my own youth:  You are marked as Christ’s own forever. 

Releasing our children into the hands of God is perhaps the most difficult and the most liberating thing we can ever do as parents.  We begin at their baptism by marking them as Christ’s own.  It seems so easy when they are babies dressed in pure white!  But as they grow – as they form their own ideas, opinions and lives – we realize this “release” is a process that lasts a lifetime.  It is a prolonged exercise in trust, for we must trust that if we let go – if we release the anxious grip we have on our children – that he will catch them!  He will hold them in a protective embrace that does not restrict them in the least.  He will sort out the mixed messages in their hearts and penetrate his gaze into the deepest, truest parts of their souls.  Only God can do these things.

Our children are growing up in confusing times.  But we have given them over to be Christ’s own forever.  And in that simple act, if we can really do it, we too will be free.

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